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Breakup Tip #41

The letdown, we’ve all had them, right?

Relationships aren’t easy; you hear it over and over again. You will have your ups and your downs but you need to stick through it. Unfortunately, there will come a time when your significant other will let you down (or vice versa). This won’t be something you plan on but let’s face it we’re all human…

Now, I’m not telling you to let this guy go because he didn’t do something he said he was going to do or he was supposed to pick up your mother from the airport but he totally forget. These things are forgivable but when a guy lets you down time after time, should you stay with him or not?

For most women we are more prone to letting things go, we say our peace and get over it. However, when a guy does something to diminish your trust time after time, it may be time to ask why are we sticking around? In particular, if a guy you are dating doesn’t seem to care anymore or he is just too lazy to do something, shouldn’t that be a huge flashing warning sign that he isn’t the
one?

I would think so.

Love is blinding, it’s true! We can make up a million excuses for a guy we are madly in love with. What I’m trying to tell you is, if a guy is consistently letting you down, not giving you the time of day or just couldn’t care less if he sees you or not, he is probably not going to get any better.

Cut the ties and let him loose, you deserve to be treated with the same respect you give him. Admittedly, guys and girls will let each other down, we all make mistakes but when a guy doesn’t care enough about a girl it will be clear in his actions. So, keep this in mind, don’t get walked over, be strong and be brave, if he isn’t the one it’s better to know now than later.

Until next time,

Miss Behaving xox

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Breakup Tip #40

Surviving one day at a time…

A breakup can be a life altering thing; it literally can send you through a loop if you weren’t expecting it. So, what do you do when all of a sudden the person you love has decided to pull the plug, how do you go about your everyday life without them?

We all know what it feels like, you get used to speaking to them before you go to bed, you spend most of your free time with them, they know your likes, your dislikes and hey they even have their own side of the bed. Suddenly it’s like a piece of the puzzle is missing and you don’t know how to go on without them. What I’m here to tell you is you will survive!

Getting used to someone not being in your life is never easy (no matter how they left) but it doesn’t need to be impossible. What it will take is a step by step process to getting back to a normal routine. Find out what YOU like to do and what things you would like to accomplish in your future. What it doesn’t mean is stalking/calling your ex everyday begging them to take you back.

It’s not easy forgetting someone you cared about but gradually you will move on, I can’t tell you how long this will be or when but one day you will realize you are better off without them. Believe me when I tell you I have been there and as much as the heartache hurt (almost killed me), in the end I was the person who was better off.

Give yourself time, lean on your friends and family and spend time finding yourself. You never know who you might meet along the way!

Until next time,

Miss Behaving xox

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Breakup Tip #39

Breakups are tough just ask those kicked off the Bachelorette…

A new season of the Bachelorette is upon us and while the girls across the nation gather around their TV’s to see the latest drama and make fun of how ridiculous some of those cheesy lines are (I believe my husband is in this room…please), we can take a few things away from the guys.

Break-ups, whether on TV or off it are hard. Yes, you may have only known said person for about 20 minutes or less because she (or he) was busy meeting other attractive 20-something year olds but that was a genuine connection and you have every right to be broken hearted.

Well, just like the many broken hearted bachelors, many of us can relate to having our heart broken. You see it doesn’t always matter how long you’ve known someone, it can take an instant to fall in love with someone and in the next minute they may be leaving you high and dry. What I’m trying to tell you ladies is that just if these poor tormented (somewhat handsome) men on the Bachelorette can be broken hearted, so can you. Who cares if you only knew the guy for 5 days, it still hurts!

What I’m trying to say here is that, breakups suck, no matter how long the relationship lasted. So, don’t feel bad that you only dated him for a month, if he meant a lot to you then you rightly feel a little sad. But, the good news here is you don’t need to spend another minute wanting him. Let some other girl deal with his drama because you are officially young, free and single and you deserve someone who will stick around for the long haul.

Until next time,

Miss Behaving xox

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Breakup Tip #37

WARNING! Don’t get too attached…

As women we tend to think long term, we want to think this relationship will last forever and when our significant other seems to be really into us we can’t help but get a little carried away. The problem? If we let ourselves get so attached to one person if they break-up with us we will be devastated.

I remember I had a friend who told me to never let myself get too attached to the person I was dating. Instead she told me to date around, always have a guy on the back burner and NEVER let him know how much you like him. Why? Because when a guy thinks he has you he tends to lose interest. While you may be picking out his and hers bath towels he is busy looking for a way to tell you that he doesn’t see this relationship going anywhere (ouch!).

So, what does this mean for the ladies who are in a loving relationships that they believe will never end? Well, as much as we hope it doesn’t end in tears we also know that being aware of what could happen might be the better option. Why? Because let’s face it no one wants to have their heart broken but if it does happen at least you didn’t dive in head first.

Let yourself enjoy your time together, take each day one by one and if it’s meant to be, it will be!

Until next time xox

Miss Behaving

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Breakup Tip #35

Have you ever heard the quote, don’t let someone become a priority when you are just an option? I wish I could tattoo this on my forehead sometimes!

It’s so easy to let someone you like become your main focus. You can’t concentrate on anything anymore, you think about this person constantly and you create-up imaginary scenarios in your mind of what will happen when you next see them, am I getting warm?

You see, as women we tend to let our emotions get the better of us. It’s easier for ladies to fall harder at first than I believe it is for a man. When a guy we like says something like, oh one day we should go to this really cool Japanese place I know, we automatically assume he is thinking that we will be with him forever. Well, ladies here is the hard cold truth. Guys (unlike girls) tend to go with the flow, they try not to stress too much about the future and they probably don’t have a wedding board on pinterest (oh darn!).

Here is some more insight; guys will make you a priority in their lives if they like you. They will want to spend time with you and you won’t have to eagerly wait by the phone in hopes he will ask you to do something this weekend. Why? Because the guy that likes you wants to make you feel special and important. If you find yourself waiting until a couple of hours before to hear from him as to whether or not you’re going to hang out this could be a red flag. What kind of guy waits for a better option to pop up instead of hanging out with you? Do you really want to be the fall back option? I didn’t think so…

So, if you don’t feel like a priority in his life, maybe it’s time to take a step back and re-analyze the situation. We deserve to be with someone who wants to spend time with us as much as we want to see them. It’s not much to ask! Oh and if you’re picking your “friend” over me, you better be sure it was worth it because I may not be coming back.

Take some control here, ladies. You deserve to be number one!
Until next time,

Miss Behaving xox

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Breakup Tip #34

Things to say and not say to your girlfriends going through a break-up…

We all have our friends who are there for us when a relationship ends, sometimes they say exactly what you want to hear and sometimes they don’t. Who can blame them right? Well, let me give you some hints as someone who has tried to comfort my friends and as someone who has been comforted myself… here we go!

Things to say:

  1. You’re going to be OK (that guy never deserved you anyway)
  2. Why not try something new (a new hobby)
  3. I will always be here if you need to talk
  4. If you need me to kill him, just say the word (I know some guys-Just kidding!)
  5. You’re a great girl and any guy would be lucky to be with you
  6. Which Ben and Jerry’s flavor would you like to try tonight? (hey, ice cream never hurt anyone!)
  7. Give yourself some time, things will get better

Things NOT to say:

  1. I’m sorry your relationship ended, he was a great guy…(thanks for the reminder!)
  2. Hey, would it be ok if I date him now?
  3. Do you know where he usually hangs out, why not stalk him and remind him what he’s missing out on (PLEASE don’t do this, I beg you)
  4. One phone call won’t hurt (he probably misses you too-HINT: he doesn’t!)
  5. Just go meet some new guys and hook up with them, you will forget him right away
  6. Date that guy (insert name) he always liked you anyway
  7. I was looking at his Facebook page for you, it looks like there are some girls that really like him (PLEASE ladies, don’t do this to your friends)

So, this is just a short list of do’s and don’ts for what to say to your friends when they are going through a break-up. Girls often need support from their friends not a reminder of why the relationship failed. Sometimes this will mean a few kind words and sometimes it will be you bringing a tub of ice cream and a spoon. It just depends on the situation but ladies; one thing we know how to do well is be a good friend to one another.

So, break out the girl power movies and the Chinese food…It’s a girls night

Love,

Miss Behaving xox

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